Infancy Part Deux

The good news is that we are reliving the 8-month to 11-month stages. The bad news is that we are reliving the 8-month to 11-month stages. Let me explain.

Chemotherapy is a real hunger-killer. Between the nausea, the mouth sores and the general fatigue, eating becomes a luxury. Lillian has lost a couple of pounds since she started this ordeal and we consulted a nutritionist who gives this advice, "give her whatever she wants, whenever she wants; the higher the calories, the better." Yes, that is coming from a nutritionist! Picture us at the grocery store comparing labels looking for the highest caloric, highest fat foods. It seemed very backwards, I can tell you that. So how does that compare to her 8-month old experience? Many of these foods are new to Lillian. She was a very healthy eater prior to this so chips and hot dogs are very new. She likes some, she doesn't like others, just like her first introduction to solid foods. And also like her first introduction to solid foods, she spits out what she doesn't like. It's very important that we keep the weight on her to avoid a feeding tube.

As I've mentioned prior, sleeping has also become a luxury. The hospital has managed to transition her to a "big girl bed" for us. But Mom or Dad (usually Dad is requested) has to lay down with her until she falls asleep. I know, I know, that is a really bad habit, tell me about it. If only we knew! For naps, we find ourselves driving around the block to get her to fall asleep. Two nights ago Lillian slept straight through from 9pm to 6am. We woke up and looked at the clock amazed, just like we did when she was an infant.

I never thought I'd be so excited to see her crawl...again. But it really is amazing. Up until very recently, she hasn't had enough strength in her right arm to help support her body weight. Last week I bough a big parachute for her to play with since that was one of her favorite Gymboree activities. I set it on the floor and before I could pick her up she had crawled right on top of it. Since then she has been crawling everywhere. She is getting stronger everyday and her balance is improving so I know walking will be just around the corner. In the meanwhile, all of those baby-proofing activities that we have gotten so lazy about have been re-instituted. Cups of water are no longer left on the coffee table. Bathroom doors are closed once again. And Christmas decorations are sensibly placed with a correlation between fragility and height.

Like I said, we get the joy and pain of reliving those early milestones yet again, but this time she's 3 feet tall and talking. That adds a degree of complexity to many adventures.

We're nearly packed for our return to Doernbecher's tomorrow. She has a hearing test, a kidney test and blood work before being admitted for chemotherapy. If all goes as planned, we should be home Saturday or Sunday.

• Pray that the tests go smoothly. The last hearing test was a bit of a nightmare, she was definitely not interested in having anything in her ears.
• Pray that her appetite persists.
• Pray that we can continue to keep her comfortable throughout the chemotherapy.
• Praise for her improved strength.
• Praise for good counts so that she could have visits from Grandpa, Auntie M, Nana and Papa. It's a nice change from just Mom & Dad.